Anytime you order something online it feels a little bit like Christmas. You track the package on it’s journey across the country, and the anticipation builds as you wait for the UPS guy to knock on your door.
Finally, the moment arrives like Christmas morning and you tear through the tape to reveal your latest treasure.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a book, a LEGO set, or Apple’s latest gadget. You still feel like a little kid unboxing a toy train in 1950. At least I do.
After compulsively refreshing the UPS tracking website for 48 hours, my iPhone 6s Plus delivered last Friday. I was so pumped that I offered the exhausted delivery guy in brown shorts some pepperoni pizza (which he gladly accepted).
I know, I know… I poked fun at people with the surfboard-sized screen for months, but at the moment of truth, I caved. And I’m so glad I did.
Besides the nearly unlimited app store and cool new features (Force Touch is pretty sweet), I’ve discovered a few unintentional uses for the iPhone 6s Plus.
Not only can you read the entire U.S. Constitution on a single screen, but the size of the iPhone 6s provides ample shelter from the elements. You can hold it above your head to shield your mortal frame from rain, snow, lightning, or the blistering sun.
Warning: your arm will suffer immense fatigue so tent poles or a tripod are recommended.
It’s aggravating when someone walks by your cubicle, bumps your desk, and sends your stack of papers and notepads cascading across the slick surface into your full cup of coffee.
The heft of the iPhone 6s provides enough gravitational force to pin your tree-killing documents to your desk, and eliminate the risk of any clumsy Dilbert doppelgangers.
Turns out I wasn’t too far off with my mockery of people who can ride their phones to work. Marty McFly would be jealous of your mad skillz as you weave around rush hour traffic on your iPhone 6s Plus hoverboard.
With the right apps you won’t even need to worry about finding a place to smuggle back an almanac from the future.
While I haven’t figured out how to engineer a lightning cable adapter for a DeLorean yet (ironic, right?), the iPhone 6s Plus comes with a handy time travel feature built-in. Once you unlock the device with the speedy Touch ID, time begins to move quicker.
The more apps you open the faster time flies by. Before you know it, you’re in 2055 and look like Doc Brown.
With iPhones being one of the top stolen devices it’s important you know how to protect yourself. There are plenty of martial arts lessons, blaring alarms, and even shotgun noises on the App Store.
However, at roughly the size and weight of a brick, the best defense is the iPhone 6s Plus itself. The autopsy of your alleged assailant will undoubtedly list the cause of death as blunt force trauma.
I’m just a week into hauling around Apple’s latest innovative masterpiece, and only scratched the surface of inventive applications.
We’ll see what else there is to discover before the iPad Pro hits stores. Hopefully they don’t get demolished.
How big is your phone? Do you have the iPhone 6/6s Plus? What is your favorite feature? What do you hope Apple comes out with next? Share in the comments.
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